【龙腾网】你的初恋教会了你什么人生经验

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What life lesson did your first love teach you?

你的初恋教会了你什么人生经验?

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Anonymous
Today, exactly 3 months back I broke up with my girlfriend. I ended my one and half year relationship with her. The reason being that she cheated on me with some other guy.
So,How do I feel after 3 months?
BETTER.
It was my first true love and she was my life. She was my oxygen. But what happens when that oxygen supply is cut off?
You PANIC. Either you die or find desperate measures for your survival.
For me it was the biggest setback of my life. I cried, cursed, and abused her.
I felt devastated but most importantly LONELY.
"And then only when we have lost everything, are we free to do anything."

3个月前的今天，我和女朋友分手了。我结束了与她一年半的关系。原因是她背着我和别的男人在一起。
那么，三个月后我感觉如何？
更好。
我的初恋曾是我的生命，是我的氧气。但当氧气供应被切断时会发生什么？
你这个胆小鬼。要么你死去，要么不顾一切的想办法活下去。
对我来说，这是我一生中最大的挫折。我哭了，诅咒并辱骂她。
我感到很沮丧，但最重要的是，我很孤独。
“只有当我们失去了一切，我们才能自由地做任何事情。”

First few days of the breakup are the toughest. For nearly 2 weeks I could not sleep. I hardly ate anything. I had no friends whom I could tell my condition. All I did was listen to sad songs and watch romantic movies. I literally saw "500 days of summer" 50 times. At that point those were the only things I could relate to. Resisting the urge to speak with my ex was the toughest thing. During the happy phase of our relationship, we used to speak everyday for nearly 8-9 hours. I used to stalk her facebook profile and check her "last seen" and "statuses" on whatsapp (which actually made me feel even worse). On Quora I used to read about breakup stories and life after breakup. Day and night, she was the only thing going around in my mind. I felt weak ,tired and frustated .I just wanted to get over her thoughts.

分手的头几天是最艰难的。将近两个星期我都睡不着。几乎什么都没吃。我没有朋友可以告诉我的病情。我所做的就是听悲伤的歌，看浪漫的电影。我真的看了50遍“《和莎莫的500天》”。在那一刻，这些是我唯一能联系到的事情。抵制与前任交谈的冲动是最困难的事情。在我们关系的幸福阶段，在我们恋爱的幸福时期，我们每天都要交谈近8-9个小时。我曾经潜近她的facebook资料，查看她在whatsapp上的“最后一次见面”和“状态”(这实际上让我感觉更糟)。我曾经在Quora上读过关于分手的故事和分手后的生活。日日夜夜，她都是我脑子里唯一的念头。我感到虚弱、疲倦和沮丧。我只想忘掉她。

And after 3 weeks my heart told my mind ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!
I told myself that I deserve better and maybe I am too good for her.
I started working on my skills. I wanted to be a better person. I bought a guitar and started learning it. Now after 3 months I can play 4-5 chords and I have developed a passion for it. I started reading novels and answers on quora. I also joined a gym.
I realized that the only way I can stop thinking about her is to keep myself busy. Trust me it helps.
Take this moment as a learning phase. Work on your personality and let the person regret her loss. WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH,THE TOUGH GETS GOING.
The most important thing that I have learned with my breakup is to never depend too much on a person. My mistake. I made her the center of my life.

三个星期后，我的心告诉我，适可而止了！
我告诉自己我应该得到更好的，也许我对她太好了。
我开始练习我的技能。我想成为一个更好的人。我买了一把吉他并开始学习。三个月后，我能弹4-5个和弦，我已经对它产生了热情。我开始阅读小说和quora上的答案。我还走进了一个健身房。
我意识到，我能停止想她的唯一办法就是让自己忙碌起来。相信我，这有帮助。
将这一刻作为学习阶段。培养你的个性，让对方为自己的损失感到后悔。当事情变得困难时，困难就开始了。
我从分手中学到的最重要的一点是永远不要过分依赖一个人。我犯过的错误是我让她成为我生活的中心。

In the last 3 months I have not contacted her, though, I still miss her, and looking at her photo with some other guy makes me cry. However, I have accepted the fact that she is not with me anymore. I do miss those long conversations and hugs. But then that's life. You get things at the most unexpected times of your life.
Remember all this sacrifice will one day fetch you the result,so just be patient. LOVE IS THE BEST AND THE WORST THING A PERSON CAN EVER DO. That's why its called "falling".
In the end I am actually thankful to my ex for teaching me how to live on my own. I have become a much better person now and for me the whole perspective of life has changed. Self growth and personality development is all that I am seeking for now.

在过去的三个月里，我没有联系过她，但我仍然想念她，看着她和其他男人的照片，我不禁落泪。然而，我已经接受了一个事实，那就是她不再和我在一起了。我真的很怀念那些长时间的交谈和拥抱。但那就是生活。你会在生命中最意想不到的时候得到东西。
记住，所有的牺牲总有一天会给你带来结果，所以请耐心等待。爱是一个人能做的最好的也是最坏的事情。这就是为什么它被称为“坠落”。
最后，我真的很感谢我的前任教我如何独立生活。我现在已经成为一个更好的人，对我来说，生活的整个视角都改变了。自我成长和人格发展是我现在所追求的一切。

Because One day she will meet a successful me and regret her loss.:)
NOTE: This is my first post on Quora. During my tough phase, Quora has helped me a lot to recover. I had promised myself that one day when I feel better, I, too, will write an answer. Hope you all like my sincere attempt. Sorry I have kept myself anonymous because I am actually not comfortable (I have friends here) :p

因为有一天，她会遇到一个成功的我，并为自己的失败感到遗憾
注：这是我在Quora上的第一篇帖子。在我艰难的阶段，Quora对我恢复提供了很多帮助。我曾向自己保证，有一天我感觉好了，我也会写一个答案。希望你们都喜欢我这篇真诚的尝试性的回答。对不起，我一直保持匿名，因为我实际上不舒服（我有朋友在逛Quora）

Amy Zhang
What life lessons have video games taught you?
This will sound ridiculous, but…
I thought Agar.io reflected life.
You start small, and usually, no one notices you much.
As time progresses, you keep working and you grow.
People start noticing you and some try to devour you for their own benefit. They see you as either predator or prey.
You can also help each other out by giving up a tiny bit of yourself (time, energy etc) in exchange for an alliance. (Friendship.)
Sometimes, things don’t go so well, and you’ll need to make huge sacrifices in order to survive. (Splitting to escape a predator.)
The bigger you get, the slower you move. (Responsibilities.)
When you get to the top be wary of “friends”
The bigger you are, the easier it becomes to kill newer players.

电子游戏教会了你什么生活经验？
这听起来很荒谬，但…
我想《Agar.io》反映了生活。
你从小做起，通常没人注意到你。
随着时间的推移，你不断工作，不断成长。
人们开始注意到你，有些人为了自己的利益而试图吞噬你。他们将你视为捕食者或猎物。
你也可以通过放弃自己的一小部分(时间、精力等)来帮助对方，以换取联盟。(友谊)。
有时候，事情进展得不太顺利，为了生存，你需要做出巨大的牺牲。（为了躲避捕食者而分裂。）
你越大，动作越慢。（职责。）
当你到达顶峰时，要提防“朋友”
你越强大，就越容易杀死新玩家。