瓦尔的日记

        本来第一期就要放出来的，但因为刚出的时候播放量不太理想，心情沮丧所以就没来得及发专栏。因为四期视频就算做完也依旧存在很多疑点，正好有朋友对文中的剧情提出了质疑，所以直接分享出来，也方便对逃生2剧情有兴趣的观众辅助了解。

        由于水平有限和个人风格所致，所以翻译只能达到信和雅的效果，翻译过程中不免存在一些问题，如果有不同的观点和看法也欢迎在评论区分享你的见解。

        如果要引用也不用找我私聊哈，直接注明出处就好了，如果你愿意艾特我一下，我是非常愿意给你个三连的~

Val's Journal（瓦尔的日记）

 

Part 1

 

January 7

 

Three more were sent today to live among the Scalled, their sores too florid to disguise. They had seven children between them, all of whom Papa Knoth has sent with the others into my foster care. I now have more than forty orphans under my wing, who love me desperately, as only can a child abandoned by the parents they thought were as natural and dependable a fact as the rising sun. And I love them. As I will never have children of my own, and have so much love to give.

 

When God leaves them, too, I will be there with comforts and guidance.

 

What do these dreams mean?

 

1月7日

今天又送来了3个人，他们将与芥藓之人住在一起，他们的痛苦如此明显，根本无法掩盖。还有7个孩子。克诺斯神父将他们送到我这来了。跟其他孩子一样，由我来抚养。现在我要照看40多个孤儿，他们爱我爱到了极点。在他们看来，父母抛弃孩子是再正常不过的，就好像太阳每天都会升起一样。我也爱他们，正因为我永远不会有自己的孩子了，所以我有那么多的爱需要给予。当上帝也离开了他们，我还是会在这，给他们慰藉和指引。

这些梦意味着什么?

 

Part 2

 

March 9

 

A quiet sky. Six more of my own children (though no blood of my own) met the blade this morning. I wept as at the slaughter of the issue of my own loins. I cut Marcus' throat deep enough for the knife to scrape against spine, but still he was writhing on the pyre. And Papa smiled and sang about gathering at the river. All the voices of Temple Gate joined in chorus.

 

Only one voice was absent, and conspicuously so.

 

God should have answered by now. Whether by words or action: God please give us an answer. Fulfill the promises of your prophet.

 

We have sent such oblations into the earth by blood and into the sky by flesh burnt to smoke that this continued silence is a message in itself. Do any love God as I do? As often as I do?

 

3月9日

那是一个宁静的清晨。我的六个孩子被利刃残忍杀害﹐尽管他们并非我的骨肉，但我依然忍不住放声哭泣。我用这把刀划开了马库斯的喉咙，刀口足够深，甚至可以看到他的脊柱﹐但他死前挣扎的模样却依旧让我感到恶心。神父微笑着﹐唱起了一首河边集会的歌。神殿之门的所有人都加入了合唱。

只有一个人没唱﹐如此明显。

现在上帝应该有所回应了。不论用言语还是行动。上帝，请回答我，履行你的先知许下的诺言。

我们用血祭祀大地﹐用肉祭祀天空。沉默继续着﹐这本身就是一则讯息。有人像我一样爱上帝吗﹖如我一样虔诚?

 

Part 3

 

March 9

 

More children dead. Knoth says there is no sin in such infanticide, as all are soldiers in God's army. Martyrs fallen on the field in defiance of the Archfiend. All those babies with slit throats and charred flesh will be waiting immaculate for us in paradise.

 

Papa Knoth also says that our sins find us in our dreams. Our sins find us in our dreams. But my dreams are nothing but the murder of my children. And I wake laughing, and aroused, and often wet with the involuntary lust of sleep.

 

I woke this morning thinking I was wetted with the blood of a child's slit throat. But it was wetness of my own making.

 

The others are having similar dreams. We have dug a tunnel so that we may meet in secret. We gather and share our visions and wonder at their meaning.

 

I feel increasingly this is a message. But nothing holy.

 

3月9日

又有孩子死了。克诺斯说﹐杀婴并非罪恶﹐因为他们都是上帝麾下的普通士兵。在反抗魔王的斗争中﹐烈士们倒下了。那些喉咙被割开﹑尸体被焚烧的婴儿洁净无瑕﹐它们将在天堂等着我们。

克诺斯神父还说﹐我们将在梦里与自己的罪恶不期而遇。在梦里﹐罪恶找到了我们。但是在梦里﹐我只看到沾满鲜血的双手﹐没有别的。我大笑着醒来﹐欲火焚身﹐汗流浃背﹐渴望安眠。

今天早上醒来的时候﹐我以为浑身都是从孩子被割开的喉咙里流出的鲜血。但是那实际上只是我自己的汗。

其他人也做类似的梦。我们挖了一条地道﹐并在这里秘密碰头。我们聚在一块﹐分享着我们看到的景象﹐并探讨其中的含义。

我越来越觉得﹐这是一则讯息。与神圣并无关联。

 

 

Part 4

 

June 17

 

Tell me more. Give me more. You have a thousand names and I know none of them. I know it is not God. I know it is not Yahweh, nor Ezekiel, nor any dog leashed to that gas-bloated corpse, swollen on the heat of his own shit and rotting meats. Give me pleasure. Fuck me and cut my skin. Burn me and caress me. I am a membrane seeking penetration. Be aroused at my awe. Let my fear give you appetite. I love you, I love you, I love you. Tell me what you want. Tell me your name and I am yours.

 

6月17日

 

再说一些，再给我些。你有上千个名字﹐我却无一知晓。我知道﹐你的名字不是上帝，不是耶和华﹐也不是以西结﹐你不是拴在那具尸体（克诺斯口中的“上帝”）上的任何一只畜生。那具散发着腐臭气息的尸体。让我愉悦吧。干我﹐割开我的肌肤，焚烧我吧﹐爱抚我吧。我愿为你付出我的一切。迷上我吧﹐蹂躏我吧，让我的恐惧激发你的X欲。我爱你我爱你我爱你！告诉我你想要什么。告诉我你的名字﹐我是你的。

 

Part 5

 

June 19

 

I cut the children's throats in dreams and wake filled with sex and appetite. I love you, I am yours. I cut the throats of Knoth's sheep in waking life and sex floods me like the fear of fire in a child. I love you, I am yours. I could fuck and burn the world for all my joy. I love you. I am yours. I will purge this world, soft with rot, of all but ecstasy and terror, so that you may build your throne on the charred remains. I love you, I am yours. I know now as surely as I breath what I never knew of that flaccid, distant God. You love me. I am yours.

 

 

6月19日

我在梦里割开那些孩子们的喉咙﹐醒来后﹐充满了欲望。我爱你﹐我是你的。从梦中醒来后﹐我割开了克诺斯的羊的喉咙。X欲淹没了我﹐就好像孩子们感到的恐惧之火。我爱你﹐我是你的。我可以蹂躏﹑焚烧这个世界﹐一切都不过为了取乐。我爱你。我是你的。我将净化这个腐烂的世界﹐这个充满堕落和恐怖的世界﹐然后在烧焦的残骸上建立属于你的宝座。我爱你﹐我是你的。我现在完全肯定﹐我从未了解过那个冷酷无情的上帝。我爱你。我是你的。