【塞尔达】宫本茂为什么要把塞尔达公主命名为塞尔达？塞尔达的灵感来源究竟是一...
我们吃樱桃派、喝最后一瓶酒时，他问：“你知道我没跟泽尔达之外的任何女人睡过。”
“我不知道。”
“我以为我告诉过你。”
“不。你告诉过我许多事，但这个没有。”
“那跟我必须问你的事有关。”
“好的。问吧。”
“泽尔达说，就我的状况，我不可能取悦其他女人，她对我不满也源于此。她说这是个尺寸问题。她这么说过后，我一直感觉不对，我得确认下。”
“我们去办公室。”我说。
“办公室在哪儿？”
“洗手间。”我说。
我们回到餐桌边坐下。
“你完全没问题。”我说，“你没问题。没有哪里不对劲。你低头看自己，当然会觉得短些。去卢浮宫，看看那些雕塑，再回家看看镜子里的自己。”
“那些雕塑可能不准确。”
“他们很正常。大多数人都和他们一样。”
“但她为何这么说？”
“是为了让你丧失信心。这是让世上的男人丧失信心最古老的法子了。斯科特，你要我告诉你真相，我可以告诉你更多，但这就是绝对的真相，这就是你所需要的一切。你也可以去问个医生。”
“我不想去。我想你告诉我真相。”
“你现在相信我吗？”
“我不知道。”他说。
“我们去卢浮宫。”我说，“就在街那头，过河就是。”
我们去到卢浮宫，他看了雕塑，但依然不相信自己。
“平时它休息时的尺寸不成问题，”我说，“尺寸是指它BQ之后的模样，这里也有角度的问题。”我用个枕头和其他一些东西帮助他理解。
“有个女孩，”他说，“她对我很亲切，但泽尔达这么说过之后……”
“忘掉泽尔达说的话。”我告诉他，“泽尔达疯了。你一点问题也没有。有点信心，满足那女孩。泽尔达只是想毁了你。”
“你对泽尔达一无所知。”
“好的，”我说，“这一点随意好了。但你来吃午饭，问了我个问题，我已经尽力给了你诚实的答案。”
——《流动的盛宴》张佳玮译版
As reported in A Moveable Feast, Fitzgerald sought Hemingway's counsel about Zelda's complaint that his penis was too small to satisfy her. If true, it was an indication of Fitzgerald's respect for Hemingway's expertise in masculine matters that he turned to him for help; but he should have known that his admission would provoke Hemingway's contempt. After checking him in the men's room, Hemingway assured him that he was normal and urged him to repair his confidence by sleeping with somebody else:“Zelda just wants to destroy you.”
Zelda extended her attack on Fitzgerald's masculinity by charging that he was involved in a homosexual liaison with Hemingway, which hurt him more than anything else she said:“The nearest I ever came to leaving you was when you told me you that I was a fairy in the Rue Palatine.…” She cited as evidence his muttering“No more baby”in his sleep after coming home drunk from a meeting with Hemingway. Zelda's accusation was especially painful to Fitzgerald because he had always been contemptuous of“fairies.”It is fashionable to claim that men who are strongly biased against homosexuals are masking their sexual insecurities or compensating for impulses of which they are ashamed. ( This charge has been frequently brought against Hemingway. ) Anyone can be called a latent homosexual, but there is no evidence that Fitzgerald was ever involved in a homosexual attachment. His close friendships with men were expressions of his hero worship and generosity. If Father Fay was a homosexual, as has been asserted without proof, Fitzgerald was presumably unaware of it. Fitzgerald remarked in his Notebooks: “The great homosexual theses — that all great pansies were pansies.”
It is not known whether he reported Zelda's accusation to Hemingway, but Fitzgerald began to worry that he was acquiring a reputation as a homosexual. He was not ready to dismiss Zelda's charge as an indication that she was becoming deranged. ( Suspicion about other people's sexual behavior is one of the symptoms of schizophrenia; and impotence is sometimes a side-effect of alcoholism. ) Intending to verify his masculinity, Fitzgerald decided to try sleeping with a whore and purchased condoms; Zelda found them, and a bitter argument ensued. At the same time she was expressing these suspicions about her husband, Zelda became concerned that she was a latent lesbian. Fitzgerald was furious when Dolly Wilde, a notorious Paris “amazon,”made a pass at Zelda in May 1929.
——《Some Sort of Epic Grandeur》Matthew J. Bruccoli
