英语【读后续写】如何写出高分好句？变身超级造句机~
七七 | 读后续写高分长句破解
环境 动作 情感
时间/地点/过渡, sb., with sth. in one's hand, doing B, did A, doing C, feeling / looking...
1️⃣动作稍怎么办
男孩跳入湖中嬉戏
- 冲向湖边：rush to the lake
- 脱掉衣服：take off his clothes
- 跳入水中：jump into the water
Having taken off his clothes, the boy rushed to the lake and jumped into the water.
歌手唱歌
- 扫视观众：cast a glance at the audience
- 深吸一口气：take a deep breath
- 开始演唱：begin to sing
After casting a glance at the audience, the singer took a deep breath and began to sing.
老人静坐
- 坐在地铁上：sit on the subway
- 盯着手机：stare at his phone
- 皱着眉头：knit his brows / frown
Absorbed in reading, the man sat still on the subway, frowning.
2️⃣拆解练习二
流畅三连：
- Sb. did A, did B and did C.
同时发生：
- Sb. did A, doing B and doing C.
- Doing B and C, sb. did A.
有先有后，有因有果
- （先/因）Having done A, sb. did B and C（后/果）.
- Sb did A and B, doing C（果）.
- After/Before doing A, sb. did B to do C（目的）
我要带上最好的剑、翻过最高的山、闯入最深的森林、把公主带回来
流畅三连
- l climbed over the highest mountain, found my way into the deep forest and brought back the princess.
同时发生
- Carrying the best sword, l went into the deep forest and brought the princess back.
有先有后，有因有果
- a. I climbed over the highest mountain and found my way intothe dense forest, bringing back the princess.
- b. After climbing over the highest mountain, l found my way into the dense forest to bring back the princess.
3️⃣加情感
正面
- excited / thrilled（兴奋的）
- joyful / overjoyed（快乐的，欣喜若狂的）
- amazed（惊讶的）
- delighted（高兴的）
- satisfied（满足的）
负面
- sacred（害怕的）
- worried（担心的）
- ashamed（羞愧的）
- nervous（紧张的）
- depressed（沮丧的）
原因/伴随
- Depressed and helpless, the princess cried out.
结果
- He finally found his way into the forest, exhausted but excited.
伴随
- He brought back the princess, feeling proud and excited.
4️⃣加个buff/工具
with sth. in one's hand
with sth. on one's head
with the help of sb.
with a smile on his/ her face
He climbed over the hill with a sword in his hand.
He, with the help of an elf（精灵）, saved the princess.
5️⃣加过渡
（情绪）To one's surprise / delight / relief,…
Hopefully, / Obviously, / Of course,…
To our surprise, he brought back the princess.
表“时间、用时”
- 马上：in no time, immediately
- 那一刻：at that moment / time / when / while / as
- 早/中/晚：early in the morning, in the late afternoon, the next / following morning
表“先后”
- 然后：(and) then, after that
- 不久：after a while, soon afterwards, shortly after, before long
- 最终：at last, in the end, finally, eventually
6️⃣状语串烧
Materials
- before long：时间
- into the forest：地点
- to our surprise：过渡
- with the help of an elf：工具
- feeing proud and excited：情绪
只要是状语，在三个位置上，都符合语法要求。如：
- With a sword in his hand, the soldier entered the forest.
- The soldier, with a sword in his hand, entered the forest.
- The soldier entered the forest with a sword in his hand.
数量可增减，位置可变化
Mix it up !
To our surprise, he, with the help of an elf, savedour princess, feeling proud and excited.
Carrying the best sword, he eventually found hisway into the dense forest, exhausted but excited.
Before long, he, with the best sword in his hand, saved our princess, finding their way through the woods.
评分要点
- 细节刻画意识
- 过渡衔接意识
