Avicii传记翻译P92—100 中英对照
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EMILY GOLDBERG FLOATED in the mornings. Being a student at George Washington University had been fun recently, and now, in the spring of 2011, she had only a few months left before she would finish her bachelor’s degree in art history. Carefree and open, the twenty-one-year-old danced over to the next lecture. In her headphones thumped Skrillex’s ‘Scary Monsters And Nice Sprites’, a high-octane song that was a sign of something new. Skrillex was a DJ from Los Angeles who took dubstep, the style that had been developed in London, and made it less murky, more efficient and crisper. Gently scattered trance melodies torn by a roaring bass – music that was shuddering like a chainsaw in quicksand, as music magazine Spin wrote in a report on what was happening in the United States at this time.
早晨，Emily Goldberg悠闲地散步。作为乔治·华盛顿大学的一名学生，最近的生活非常有趣。现在，2011年的春天，她只剩下几个月就能完成她的艺术史本科学位。21岁的她自由自在、开放心扉，跳着舞步走向下一堂课。她戴着耳机，听着Skrillex的Scary Monsters And Nice Sprites，这是一首高能量的歌曲，代表了一些新的东西。Skrillex是来自洛杉矶的一名DJ，他将在伦敦发展起来的dubstep风格变得更加清晰、高效、而不那么模糊。正如音乐杂志Spin在对此时美国发生的事情进行报道时所写的那样，这是一种轻柔的、散发着迷幻旋律的音乐，被一声声咆哮的低音撕裂开来——就像一把在流沙中震颤的电锯。
Because something was bubbling, there was no doubt about it. If David Guetta and the Swedish House Mafia had cracked the door for European house music a few years earlier, through their collaborations with American pop stars, it was now about to be opened wide. Rihanna had hired the Scottish producer Calvin Harris to get just enough of a screaming drop in her hit ‘We Found Love’ and even Britney Spears had made a song with a flickering sequence of dubstep.
因为一些东西正在酝酿，这是毫无疑问的。如果说几年前David Guetta和瑞典浩室黑手党通过与美国流行歌星的合作为欧洲电子音乐打开了一扇门，那么现在这扇门即将被敞开。Rihanna曾聘请苏格兰制作人Calvin Harris为她的热门单曲We Found Love加入了足够的尖叫式drop，甚至连Britney Spears也推出了一首带有Dubstep节奏的歌曲。
Emily felt that the music suited her in some way. It kind of captured who she was, or maybe who she wanted to be.
Emily感觉这种音乐在某种程度上很适合她。它有点捕捉到了她是谁，或者说她想成为谁的样子。
It was not a particularly promising time to enter adulthood in the United States. A few years earlier, a severe financial crisis had begun. Banks had crashed, economists said the country was experiencing the deepest crisis since the Depression of the 1920s. In three years, the number of long-term unemployed people had gone from just under two million to over six. Rather than a secure job, the adult world seemed to mean short-term gigs for low wages. Rather than buying their own homes, Emily’s peers took fast loans to pay the rent on sublet apartments.
在美国，进入成年并不是的一个特别有前途的时期。几年前，一场严重的金融危机爆发。银行崩溃了，经济学家称该国正在经历自20世纪20年代大萧条以来最深的危机。在三年内，长期失业人数从不到两百万增加到六百万以上。成年世界似乎意味着短期低工资工作，而不是一个稳定的工作。Emily的同龄人不是买自己的房子，而是借快速贷款来支付租赁公寓的租金。
There seemed to be a halt in development. Would the young people of today be worse off than previous generations?
发展似乎停滞了。今天的年轻人会比以前的一代更糟吗？
But at least the house music was throbbing with energy and spoke of its time. Knife Party’s song ‘Internet Friends’ was about when someone unfriended you on Facebook and you wanted to kill the idiot. In Skrillex’s biggest hit, he had sampled a young girl from Portland who shouted out her joy at having managed to balance cups in a trick on YouTube.
但至少浩室音乐充满了能量，代表了它的时代。Knife Party的歌曲Internet Friends是关于当有人在Facebook上取消关注你时，你想杀了那个白痴。在Skrillex最成功的单曲中，他采样了一位来自波特兰的年轻女孩，她在YouTube上高兴地喊出她成功地用技巧平衡了杯子。
Emily loved the warm, friendly atmosphere of the clubs and festivals that played house music. It was sweaty and primal, but since so many were tripping on Ecstasy, the atmosphere was also cuddly and cosy. The security guards received handshakes and homemade bracelets instead of threats.
Emily喜欢那些播放浩室音乐的俱乐部和音乐节的温暖、友好氛围。虽然人们很容易出汗，但由于许多人在服用摇头丸，气氛也变得亲密而舒适。保安们收到的是握手和自制手环，而不是威胁。
And maybe no one was as hopeful and euphoric as Avicii, the young guy from Sweden whose music always carried a promise that everything would work out fine.
也许没有人像来自瑞典的年轻人Avicii一样充满希望和欣喜，他的音乐总是带着一种承诺，即一切都会变得美好。
The song ‘Silhouettes’, for example, which Avicii now included in his sets – an optimistic coming-of-age saga in a few lines:
比如，Avicii现在在他的演出中包含的歌曲Silhouettes——一个乐观的成长传奇，只用几行歌词：
So we will never get back to
所以我们永远不会回到过去。
to the old school
回到旧的时代
to the old rounds, it’s all about the newfound
回到旧时场景，那都是新的回忆
we are the newborn, the world knew all about us
我们是新生儿，世界都知道我们。
we are the future and we’re here to stay
我们是未来，我们会留下
Perhaps the most important thing wasn’t the lyrics. The rock generation was obsessed with words and symbols, with deciphering the message of a lyric – the duller the descriptions, the more important it was considered to be. Self-pity and melancholy were deemed excellent qualities.
也许最重要的不是歌词。摇滚一代痴迷于文字和符号，试图解密歌词中的信息——描述越无聊，歌词就越重要。自我怜悯和忧郁被认为是极好的品质。
That was not a bit interesting for Emily Goldberg. What mattered to her was how the songs felt, what they did to her body. The lovely vibrations in her chest.
对于Emily Goldberg来说，那并不有趣。重要的是歌曲给她带来的感觉，它们对她身体的影响。在她的胸腔里美妙的共鸣。
She had just discovered Avicii’s latest song, which he had included in a mix broadcast by Pete Tong on the BBC a few months earlier. It was called ‘Levels’, a distillation of happiness, with a riff so instant that it was impossible to get out of your skull. And then that old blues voice, the raspy and full-bodied one that came in at the chorus and sang about how fantastic you could feel.
她刚刚发现了Avicii的最新歌曲，几个月前，他在Pete Tong的BBC混音广播中播放过这首歌曲。这首歌叫做Levels，这是一种幸福的精华，它重复的旋律是如此紧迫，以至于它不可能从你的脑海中消失。然后是那个老蓝调嗓音，粗糙而饱满，在合唱部分唱着关于你能感受到多么棒的歌词。
Emily Goldberg had noticed that Avicii was playing more and more in the US and saw that in the summer of 2011 he would perform in Washington, DC, at a club with room for three thousand guests.
Emily Goldberg注意到Avicii在美国的演出越来越多，她发现在2011年夏天，他将在华盛顿特区的一家能容纳三千名客人的俱乐部表演。（译者注：指2011年6月25日Avicii在Club Glow的演出）
Emily was familiar with the promoter and had made sure to be at the venue early. When she was hanging out backstage, she had shaken hands with the Swedish star, who seemed absent-minded and embarrassed.
Emily与推广员很熟悉，并确保早早来到了场馆。当她在后台闲逛时，她与这位瑞典明星握手了，他似乎心不在焉，感到尴尬。
But now they were standing on the balcony, she and her best friend, and Avicii played Swedish House Mafia’s bootleg of a Depeche Mode song.
但现在，她和她最好的朋友站在阳台上，Avicii播放着瑞典浩室黑手党的Depeche Mode歌曲混音版。
Emily looked out over the sweaty crowd on the floor below. Girls on their boyfriends’ shoulders, the smell of perfume, sweat and alcohol.
Emily俯视着楼下汗流浃背的人群。女孩们骑在男友的肩膀上，香水、汗水和酒精的气味弥漫着整个空间。
Three-quarters into the set came the song everyone had been waiting for, the one that was gaining traction on YouTube. The whole club sang in ‘Levels’ synth riff.
在演出进行四分之三的时候，终于演奏了大家一直期待的歌曲，也是在YouTube上越来越受欢迎的歌曲。整个俱乐部都跟着Levels合成器旋律一起歌唱。
DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DOOO-DO-DOOO-DO! DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DOOO-DO-DOOO-DO!
DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DOOO-DO-DOOO-DO！DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DOOO-DO-DOOO-DO！
After Etta James’s chorus, the strings filled the room. Emily closed her eyes and without thinking about it, she brought her right arm in front of her, as if she was playing the violin herself. When she looked down again, Avicii had raised his arm up into the air. He looked so incredibly happy and as the synth roared again, the spotlights moved upwards and Avicii looked towards the balcony – right at Emily, it seemed – and she felt as if her chest was about to explode.
在Etta James的合唱之后，弦乐填满了整个房间。Emily闭上眼睛，不假思索地将右臂伸到面前，仿佛她自己在拉小提琴。当她再次低头看去时，Avicii已经将他的手臂高高举起。他看起来非常开心，当合成器再次咆哮时，聚光灯向上移动，Avicii朝着阳台看去，似乎直接看向了Emily，她感觉自己的胸口快要爆炸了。
A few minutes later, when Tim had gone into a version of Adele’s ‘Rolling In The Deep’, the star’s tour manager came up. He took the girls with him, led them down the stairs and through the crowd on the dance floor. A red rope was pulled aside and suddenly Emily stood in the middle of the stage and was dancing right next to the Swede.
几分钟后，当Tim播放阿黛尔的Rolling In The Deep时，巡演经理走了过来。他带着女孩们走下楼梯，穿过舞池中的人群。一条红绳被拉开，突然Emily站在舞台中央，在这位瑞典人旁边跳舞。
Tim made a transition to his own ‘My Feelings For You’ and handed Emily a shot glass.
Tim过渡到他自己的My Feelings For You，并递给Emily一只小酒杯。
A few hours later, they were sitting in a suite at the Donovan Hotel. Someone overturned a bottle of Dom Pérignon and ran to get a towel.
几个小时后，他们坐在唐诺万酒店的套房里。有人打翻了一瓶多姆·培利农香槟，赶紧跑去拿毛巾。
‘You’re a towel,’ Tim laughed in a squeaky voice.
“你就是毛巾，”Tim尖声笑着说。
It was a reference to the South Park character Towelie, a living piece of cloth whose only interest was to constantly be as high and fucked up as possible. No one else in the room seemed to pick up the reference, but Emily shouted Towelie’s second standard phrase in falsetto: ‘You wanna get high?’
这出自《南方公园》中的角色Towelie，他是一块有生命的布料，唯一的兴趣就是不断地追求更高和更疯狂的状态。房间里没有其他人注意到这个参考，但Emily尖声喊出了Towelie的第二个标志性台词：“你想HIGH吗？”
Tim nodded at Emily, impressed. He sat down closer and began to loudly discuss which South Park episode was the best ever.
Tim对Emily点了点头，感到印象深刻。他靠近坐下，开始大声讨论哪一集《南方公园》是最好的。
Later in the morning, just before Tim passed out on the couch, he and Emily had exchanged numbers and agreed that they should be in touch again soon.
早上稍晚时候，就在Tim在沙发上睡着之前，他和Emily交换了电话号码，并同意很快再联系。
The wave of house music that swept across the United States had indeed begun to be picked up by the established music magazines. But if you wanted to follow the development in close-up, you needed to look online. Newly launched sites such as We Rave You and Dancing Astronaut wrote ecstatic articles about the shockwaves that the music sent through their writers’ bodies. According to the online magazines, virtually every track was epic, huge, a BANGER. Dutchmen such as Afrojack, Chuckie and Hardwell were described as the great masters of modern times, and when Swedish House Mafia sold out Madison Square Garden in nine minutes, it appeared to be a triumph for humanity.
席卷美国的浩室音乐浪潮确实开始受到正规音乐杂志的关注。但如果你想近距离关注其发展，你需要上网查看。新推出的网站，如We Rave You和Dancing Astronaut，写下了狂热的文章，讲述了这种音乐带来的冲击。根据在线杂志的说法，几乎每首曲子都是史诗级、巨大的、炸裂的。荷兰人Afrojack、Chuckie和Hardwell被描述为现代大师，而当瑞典浩室黑手党在九分钟内售罄麦迪逊广场花园时，这似乎是人类的胜利。
In Las Vegas, one of the reporters for Dancing Astronaut recounted a weekend when the new song ‘Levels’ had been heard at every pool party throughout the city: ‘Avicii is a god,’ he wrote, and said that he did not know what to do with his joyous body when he heard the Swede’s song. ‘Should I embrace the person right next to me because I am so uncontrollably happy that I need to share the moment with someone?’ he wondered, before finally deciding on another option – to spray beer all around him.
在拉斯维加斯，Dancing Astronaut的一位记者回忆了一个周末，当新歌Levels在整个城市的每个泳池派对上都被播放时：Avicii是上帝，他写道，并说当他听到瑞典人的这首歌时，他不知道该怎么做才能控制自己的兴奋。“我应该拥抱旁边的人，因为我太开心了，需要与他人分享这一刻吗？”他想知道，最终决定选择另一个选项——向周围喷洒啤酒。
Las Vegas was perhaps the one place in the United States where the growing popularity of dance music was most evident. The casino city was rapidly evolving, from a place where fading musical stars ended their careers, to the epicentre of a new youth culture.
拉斯维加斯或许是美国最能反映舞曲音乐日益普及的地方。这座赌城正在快速演变，从一个让过气歌星结束职业生涯的地方，变成了新青年文化的中心。
At the end of June 2011, tens of thousands of young people made a pilgrimage to a speedway stadium north of the city. They came from all over the continent, in buses and caravans and their mothers’ Ford Explorers. The girls had sewn butterfly wings on their neon-coloured tops and glued feathers on their bras, the boys came with battle paintings on their chests and glow sticks like wreaths in their hair. Others wore panda hats, fox tails and luminous tulle skirts. Alongside the stages built inside the arena, roller coasters and swings flashed in all the colours of the rainbow as acrobats sprayed fire and walked on stilts.
2011年6月底，成千上万的年轻人朝着城市北部的赛车场朝圣。他们来自整个欧洲，乘坐巴士、房车，或是母亲的福特探险者。女孩们在霓虹色的上衣上缝上蝴蝶翅膀，胸罩上粘上羽毛，男孩们则在胸前涂上战斗图案，头发上戴着发光的花环。其他人则戴着熊猫帽子、狐狸尾巴和发光的薄纱裙。除了竞技场内建造的舞台外，过山车和秋千也以彩虹般的色彩闪耀，杂技演员在上面喷火走钢丝。
Around seventy thousand people came every day to join this psychedelic event, the Electric Daisy Carnival, to make out to Swedish House Mafia’s fireworks and pump their hands in the air to European stars such as Laidback Luke, David Guetta, Tiësto and Nicky Romero. In many ways it was like a high-pitched version of the raves outside London in 1988 – the same dizzying feeling of reality being elevated to something magical. The organisers had realised that the word ‘rave’ had become impossible to use in the United States, but when they hired enough security personnel and instead called the spectacle a ‘festival’, it all became politically viable.
每天约有七万人来参加这场迷幻活动，雏菊电音嘉年华（EDC)，，向Laidback Luke、David Guetta、Tiësto和Nicky Romero等欧洲明星挥舞着手。在许多方面，这就像是1988年伦敦外面的狂欢派对的高音版本——令人眩晕的现实感被提升到了某种奇妙的感觉。组织者已经意识到在美国使用狂欢派对这个词已经不可能了，但当他们雇用了足够的安保人员，改称这场盛会为音乐节，一切都变得政治可行了。
Tim went on stage on the third and final night. From his place behind the decks, he watched the beautiful madness. From above, it was impossible to distinguish any single face, the bodies spreading out like a sparkling coral reef swaying on the seabed. It was easy to think that this huge production would put the nerves to the test, but it was actually much nicer to play here than to confront the scrutinising gazes at one of the small clubs in France or Germany. In the sea of glowing phone cameras, it was impossible to see if anyone was staring sceptically or choosing to go to the bar in the middle of a drop. Here was a riot fence and distance from the crowd. Besides, Tim had worked up a damn good set, he knew it himself. Apart from a Nicky Romero remix, a Dirty South tune and a song by the Swede Henrik B, he was now able to do an hour and twenty minutes with only his own songs.
Tim在第三个也是最后一个晚上登上了舞台。站在碟机后面，他看着美妙的混乱。从上面看，不可能分辨出任何一个单独的面孔，人们散开，像海底摇曳的闪烁珊瑚礁。人们很容易认为这样庞大的场景会让人紧张不安，但实际上在这里表演要比在法国或德国的小俱乐部面对苛刻的目光要舒适得多。在闪光的手机相机的海洋中，不可能看到有人持怀疑态度或选择在音乐高潮时去酒吧的情况。在这里有防暴栅栏，与观众有距离。此外，Tim的混音很棒，他自己也知道。除了一首Nicky Romero的混音、一首Dirty South的歌曲和一首瑞典人Henrik B的歌曲，他现在能够在一个小时二十分钟内只用自己的歌曲混音。
The steady rhythm pulsed through Tim Bergling’s jerking legs. Damp with perspiration, his upper body bobbed over the decks, behind him flashed almost a hundred screens that together wrote out AVICII in purple and turquoise. Tim put on a majestic hymn he called ‘Edom’ – simply the word mode spelled backwards – and looked out over the people who were crackling in red, white and blue. They had become a single body reacting at the same time, hovering in a state unlike anything else.
稳定的节奏穿过Tim Bergling摇摆的双腿。他的上半身沾满了汗水，在他身后闪烁着近百个屏幕，一起用紫色和青色拼出了AVICII。Tim放了一首他称之为Edom的庄严赞歌——只是单词mode倒过来拼写——他望着那些穿着红、白、蓝闪烁的人们。他们已经变成了一个同时反应的整体，在一种前所未有的状态中飘荡。
If there was ever a moment when Avicii conquered the United States, it was probably now, 26 June 2011. Tim did not think any more, he just raised his right arm and played the chords to ‘Levels’ in the air.
如果说有一个时刻，Avicii征服了美国，那很可能是在此时，2011年6月26日。Tim不再思考，他只是举起右臂，在空中演奏Levels的和弦。
One of the people behind the rapid change in Las Vegas was Jesse Waits, a thirty-six-year-old with sparkling white teeth who was responsible for the evenings at XS, the latest addition to the giant clubs in the desert. One Friday afternoon, the managing partner showed Tim through a lavish entrance with gold-coloured textiles on the walls, into a hall shaped like a crescent moon with collections of soft, golden-brown sofas scattered on plateaus surrounding the shiny dance floor. These booths were the basis of the business model: eighty per cent of the revenue came from alcohol sales at the private tables. Here, an ordinary bottle of vodka could cost around four hundred dollars, a drink made from aged champagne and brandy went for ten thousand. The biggest players hugged champagne bottles as big as toddlers and would pay an average monthly wage for ice buckets filled with bottles of liquor and grog.
在拉斯维加斯迅速变化的背后，有一位名叫Jesse Waits的三十六岁男子功不可没。他拥有一口闪亮的白牙，并负责XS俱乐部的夜间活动，这是沙漠中最新的大型俱乐部之一。一个星期五的下午，管理合伙人带Tim穿过一个豪华的入口，墙上挂着金色的织物，进入一个月牙形的大厅，周围散布着软软的金棕色沙发，环绕着闪亮的舞池。这些包厢是业务模式的基础：80％的收入来自私人包厢的酒精销售。在这里，一瓶普通的伏特加酒可能要花费约四百美元，一杯由陈年香槟和白兰地制成的饮料则要价一万美元。最大的玩家们拥着像婴儿一样大的香槟瓶，会为装满酒和饮料的冰桶支付平均月工资的费用。
Jesse Waits himself was fairly new to house music. He had been to Paris and visited the classic gay club Le Queen and David Guetta’s own nightclub. The American had fallen in love with the fluffy compositions, the filter effects that made the music sound as if it was tumbling underwater. Jesse had come home hungover and inspired – if house music had worked in Europe, where Tiësto sold out arenas in half an hour and had received a medal from the Queen of the Netherlands, why wouldn’t it in the United States?
Jesse Waits本人对电子舞曲还比较陌生。他曾去过巴黎，并参观了经典的同志俱乐部Le Queen和David Guetta自己的夜店。这位美国人爱上了那些轻盈的作品，过滤效果使音乐听起来就像在水下翻滚。Jesse喝醉酒回到家，却充满了灵感——如果电子舞曲在欧洲行得通，在那里，像Tiësto一样的艺人能在半小时内售罄体育馆，并获得荷兰女王的勋章，为什么在美国就不行呢？
In the spring of 2011, Jesse Waits had booked Deadmau5, a Canadian DJ who, in addition to his progressive beats, had made himself known for always performing in a bulky, globular mouse mask. Waits had received unexpected help to prove that house music attracted a coveted audience when a notorious poker player had offered $200,000 to get permission to go up on stage and jump to the tunes of Jon Bon Jovi’s ‘Livin’ On A Prayer’, a song everyone in the audience was ashamed to like. Having Deadmau5 in the booth had attracted three times as many guests as usual and drawn in around $400,000 in one night, which made Waits’s managers open their wallets and ask him to book more house artists. Avicii was a given for Jesse Waits – it felt like ‘Levels’ was taking over everything at the time.
2011年春季，Jesse Waits预定了Deadmau5，这位加拿大DJ以他的渐进节拍和总是戴着笨重的球形老鼠面具而闻名。Waits意外得到帮助，以证明浩室音乐吸引了令人垂涎的观众，一位臭名昭著的扑克玩家提供20万美元，以获得上台跟着on Bon Jovi的Livin On A Prayer的曲子跳舞的许可，这是所有观众都羞于承认自己喜欢的歌曲。而当Deadmau5在碟机上表演时，吸引了平常三倍的客人，并在一个晚上获得大约40万美元的收入，这让Waits的经理们打开了他们的钱包，请他预定更多的浩室艺术家。对于Jesse Waits来说，Avicii是必然的选择 - 因为当时歌曲Levels正在席卷一切。
When Jesse picked Tim up at the airport, he noticed that the Swede was unusually nervous. He decided to try to soften up his guest by ordering sole at his favourite restaurant and tentatively starting a conversation. A little puzzled, he looked at Tim’s frizzy and sprawling hair that didn’t seem to have had a shower in more than a week, but instinctively Jesse felt that he liked the Swede. Tim seemed unrefined and sincere – it was far off from what you could say about most people, especially in this city. Maybe Jesse felt a special kinship with Tim because he, too, in a lot of ways felt like an outsider. Sure, on the surface, Waits was the city’s nightclub king, the guy who was featured in fashion reports and showed off his Louis Vuitton shoes and cars.
当Jesse去机场接Tim时，他注意到这位瑞典人异常紧张。他决定尝试通过在他最喜欢的餐厅订购比目鱼，并试探性地开始一次谈话来缓和他的客人。他有些困惑地看着Tim卷曲而凌乱的头发，似乎已经有一周没有洗澡了，但本能地，Jesse觉得他喜欢这个瑞典人。Tim似乎未经雕琢但真诚 - 这与大多数人，特别是这个城市的大多数人所说的完全不同。Jesse觉得他与Tim可能有特殊的亲缘关系，因为在很多方面，他也感觉自己像个局外人。当然，在表面上，Waits是这个城市夜总会的王者，是时尚报道中的主角，展示他的路易威登鞋子和汽车。
Very few, however, knew of Jesse Waits’ background. Since he did not want anyone to feel sorry for him, he avoided talking about growing up on one of Hawaii’s most desolate islands, in a part of the jungle where there was a total of eight houses. His mother, father and uncle had been young and good-looking surfers who had left California and moved to Hawaii to play music as loud as they wanted. Quickly, the free-spirited life had been derailed by addiction and darkness. Jesse’s father had started abusing he/ro/in and his mother had committed suicide when he was just a boy. The only memories he had of her were some photographs and four cassette tapes where she had recorded small reflections for herself. Jesse had still not been able to listen to the recordings, he didn’t dare hear his mother’s voice.
然而，很少有人知道Jesse Waits的背景。由于他不想让任何人为他感到难过，他避免谈论在夏威夷最荒凉的岛屿之一长大的经历，在一个只有八栋房子的丛林区。他的母亲、父亲和叔叔曾经是年轻而英俊的冲浪者，他们离开了加利福尼亚，搬到夏威夷，想要大声演奏自己喜欢的音乐。很快，这种自由奔放的生活被瘾症和黑暗所扰乱。Jesse的父亲开始滥用白粉，他的母亲在他还是个孩子的时候就自杀了。他仅有的对她的纪念是一些照片和四盒录有她自己反思的磁带。Jesse仍然无法听这些录音，他不敢听他母亲的声音。
Deep below the surface, he hid a vulnerability that he also saw in Tim Bergling.
在内心深处，他隐藏着一种脆弱，这也是他在Tim Bergling身上看到的。
