【中英双语】为什么现在人们越来越容易愤怒了？
Frontline Work When Everyone Is Angry
20余年来，我一直在研究工作场所的不文明行为（定义是对他人粗鲁、不尊重或漠不关心的行为），开展调研了解了世界各地数十万人的经历。
I’ve studied incivility — defined as rudeness, disrespect, or insensitive behavior — in workplaces for more than 20 years, polling hundreds of thousands of people worldwide about their experiences.
我的研究发现，随着时间的推移，关于不文明行为的报告有所增加——这不仅可以从飞机乘客拒绝戴口罩、咖啡馆顾客大骂带有种族歧视的蔑称等网络热门视频中得到证明，前不久我的问卷调查结果也证明了这一事实。调查询问了世界各地两千多人最近感受到的不文明行为。在这场全球卫生危机中，即使一线工作人员被誉为不可或缺的英雄，也依然会成为出气筒。疲惫不堪、压力太大且往往失去理智的顾客（有时是同事）把焦虑和挫败感发泄在他们身上。
My research has found that reports of incivility are indeed on the rise — as evidenced not just by viral videos of airline passengers refusing to wear masks or café patrons hurling racial epithets but also by my recent survey that asked more than 2,000 people around the world how they have experienced rudeness lately. Even amid a global health crisis in which frontline workers were heralded as essential and heroic, these employees still became punching bags on whom weary, stressed-out, often irrational customers (and sometimes fellow employees) took out their anxieties and frustrations.
这种不文明行为，不仅对直接经历它的员工有负面影响，目睹行为的人也会受到影响——这些都会损害企业与社会。本文将探讨这类后果，并讨论领导者如何协助改善现状。
This kind of incivility leads to negative outcomes not only for the workers who experience it directly but also those who witness it — all of which harms businesses and society. In this article, we’ll explore those consequences and discuss how leaders can help to improve things.
注意，不文明行为有多种形式，从忽视他人到故意妨害他人，再到嘲笑、戏弄和轻视他人。尽管不文明行为可能会演变成攻击性的行为，但本文中所指的不文明行为并非物理攻击或暴力。
Note that incivility takes many forms, from ignoring people to intentionally undermining them to mocking, teasing, and belittling them. For this article, it does not refer to physical aggression or violence, although incivility can spiral into aggressive behaviors.
我们身在何处
Where We Are
辨别和研究不文明行为可能很困难，因为不良行为是由承受者的感受决定的。你认为某种行为不文明，顾客或许并不这么想。但如果你觉得自己没有得到尊重，无论对方是有意还是无意，你的工作都会受到影响。另外，对不文明行为的判断还会因文化、世代、性别、行业和组织而异。
Identifying and studying incivility can be difficult, because bad behavior is often in the eye of the recipient. Behavior you consider uncivil may not be regarded the same way by a customer — but if you feel disrespected, whether your counterpart intended it or not, your work will suffer. In addition, what’s considered uncivil varies by culture, generation, gender, industry, and organization.
不管个人如何定义不文明行为，人们对不文明行为的报告都变得更多了，并且已经持续一段时间了。2005年接受我问卷调查的员工里，近一半的人表示自己每个月至少在工作中受到一次粗暴对待。2011年这个比例上升到55%，2016年已经提升到了62%。
Regardless of how individuals define incivility, they’re reporting more of it — and have been for a while now. In 2005 nearly half of the workers I surveyed across the globe said they were treated rudely at work at least once a month. In 2011 it was up to 55%, and by 2016 it had climbed to 62%.
2022年8月，我设计了一项新的问卷调查，进一步追踪不文明行为的发展趋势，并更深入了解当今企业及社会一线的状况。这套问卷借鉴了之前我与南加州大学马歇尔商学院营销学教授德博拉·麦金尼斯（Deborah MacInnis）和瓦莱丽·福克斯（Valerie Folkes）一同开展的以顾客为中心的研究，以及来自各行各业面向消费者的从业人员的观点。
In August of this year, I designed a new survey to further track incivility trends and glean more insight into what’s happening on the front lines of business and society today. It drew on customer-focused studies I previously conducted with marketing professors Deborah MacInnis and Valerie Folkes at USC Marshall School of Business, as well as on insights from people in a range of consumer-facing industries.
在新的问卷调查中，我收集的数据来自世界各地（除南极洲以外所有主要地区皆有）25个行业两千多个不同职位的人，包括一线员工和在工作中观察过一线员工的人。以下是调查结果：
In the new survey, the data I collected came from more than 2,000 people in more than 25 industries in various roles across the globe (representing every major region except Antarctica). They included both frontline employees and people who had observed them at work. Here’s what I found:
● 76%的受访者每月至少遭遇一次不文明行为；
● 78%的人每月在工作中至少目睹一次不文明行为，70%的人每月至少目睹两到三次；
● 73%的受访者表示顾客不良行为并不罕见；
● 78%的人认为现在顾客对员工的不良行为比五年前更常见；
● 66%的人认为现在顾客对其他顾客的不良行为比五年前更常见。
● 76% of respondents experience incivility at least once a month.
● 78% witness incivility at work at least once a month, and 70% witness it at least two to three times a month.
● 73% report that it’s not unusual for customers to behave badly.
● 78% believe that bad behavior from customers toward employees is more common than it was five years ago.
● 66% believe bad behavior from customers toward other customers is more common than it was five years ago.
从我2012年开展关于顾客不文明行为的问卷调查至今，这些数字一直在大幅度稳定增长。当时61%的参与者表示顾客的不良行为并不罕见，49%的人认为顾客对员工的不良行为比五年前更为普遍，35%的人认为顾客对其他顾客的不良行为也更普遍了。
These numbers have risen steadily and sharply since my 2012 survey about customer incivility. In that survey, 61% of respondents reported that it was not unusual for customers to behave badly, 49% believed that bad behavior from customers toward employees was more common than it was five years before, and 35% believed bad behavior from customers toward other customers was also more common.
情况已经十分恶劣。一些不文明行为过于极端，难以纠正，而一些人没有动力改变或不愿改变。在我的研究中，4%的人说自己行为粗鲁是因为这样很有趣，而且不会遭到处罚。不过研究表明，许多不文明行为是可以控制的，要做到这一点，我们需要了解不文明行为的驱动要素。
Needless to say, it’s gotten pretty ugly out there. Some uncivil behavior may be too extreme to fix, and some people are unmotivated or unwilling to change; in my research, 4% of people report being rude because it’s fun and they can get away with it. But research shows that much of incivility can be reined in. To do that, we need to understand its drivers.
我们为何到了这个地步
How We Got Here
那么，为什么不文明现象似乎越来越严重？我的研究表明，是多方因素的综合作用让我们到了这个地步：
So, why does it feel like incivility is getting worse? My research suggests that several compounding factors and pressures have brought us to this point:
压力
多年以来，我发现压力始终是不文明行为的头号驱动因素。在我最近的数据里，曾经粗鲁对待同事的受访者有73%将这种行为归咎于压力，61%的人说是工作负担太重。传染病、经济、战争、政治观点分化、工作性质变化，以及持续的不确定性，都造成了巨大的影响。
Stress.
Over the years, I’ve found that stress is the number one driver of incivility. In my most recent data, 73% of respondents who had been rude to a coworker blamed it on stress, and 61% pointed to being overloaded with work. The pandemic, the economy, war, divisive politics, the changing nature of work, and continued uncertainty are all taking a toll.
负面情绪
心中涌动负面情绪的时候，我们可能会发脾气，或者把情绪发泄在别人身上，而且常常意识不到这一点。即使保持克制，当我们不舒服时，在这方面的注意程度也会下降，更难用积极且尊重人的方式互动。
Negative emotions.
Naturally, as negative emotions swell in us, we may lash out or take them out on others, often without realizing it. Even if we muster restraint, when we’re not feeling well we’re less mindful and less capable of interacting positively and respectfully.
弱化的联结
我们也可以把粗鲁行为蔓延的现象归因于社群和工作场所普遍的人际关系破裂。如果人们感觉不到自己被重视、被欣赏或被倾听，缺乏社群的感受就会加剧——绝大多数员工都是这样。有时微妙（或者没那么微妙）的行为最让人难受。
Weakened ties.
We can also attribute the epidemic of rudeness to a general fraying of community and workplace relationships. The feeling of lacking community is exacerbated when people don’t feel valued, appreciated, or heard — which applies to the vast majority of employees. Sometimes subtle (or not-so-subtle) behaviors are what sting most.
技术
技术有很多好处，但也可能导致更严重的脱节和不文明行为。正如许许多多的一线员工和收银员所说，技术还会让我们分散注意力，不关注面前的人。我们往往忙着刷Instagram或者戴着耳机听音乐，顾不上跟为自己服务或结账的人互动——说出简单的“你好”“请”或“谢谢你”的次数也减少了。
Technology.
For all its benefits, technology can lead to greater disconnection and rudeness. It can also distract us from the humans in front of us, as countless frontline employees and cashiers have reported. Often we’re too busy scrolling through Instagram or listening to music on our headphones to interact with those serving us or ringing up our groceries — much less to utter a simple “Hello,” “Please,” or “Thank you.”
这种对技术的重度使用，特别是对社交媒体的使用，可能会让我们付出代价。我们每天都在（有意识或无意识地）接收大量负面情绪。我们消费的内容不仅影响自己，也影响其他人。我们从网上获取的东西可能影响我们的情绪和心理健康，而且我们也会把自己的焦虑、抑郁和压力传递给别人。
This heavy use of technology, and of social media in particular, may come with a price: We’re taking in a whole lot of negativity (consciously or unconsciously) on a daily basis. The content we consume affects not only us but others too. What we ingest from online sources can harm our mood and mental health, and we can pass our anxiety, depression, and stress on to others.
最后，在数字时代，信息往往会被沟通障碍和误解影响——而不幸的是，辱骂更容易发生在非面对面交流的情况下。虽然电子通信以非凡的方式将我们集合在一起，却也让我们隔着一个安全的距离，自由地表达自己的挫败感、辱骂和蔑视他人。
Finally, in the digital age messages are often subject to communication gaps and misunderstanding — and, unfortunately, putdowns are more easily delivered when it doesn’t happen face-to-face. While electronic communication can bring us together in remarkable ways, it also liberates us to voice our frustrations, hurl insults, and take people down a notch from a safe distance.
缺乏自我意识
我在几十年的研究中得到的最大启迪之一是，不文明行为通常源于无知，而非恶意。人们缺乏自我意识。根据与我合作的组织心理学家塔莎·尤里克（Tasha Eurich）的研究，高达95%的人觉得自己有自我意识，但实际上能意识到自己行为的人只有10%到15%。这意味着80%到85%的人误解了他人对自己的看法和自己对他人的影响。我们也许用意是好的，并且努力保持耐心和宽容，但我们的语气、非语言信号或行动，在互动对象和互动见证人看来，或许是别的意思。
Lack of self-awareness.
One of the biggest takeaways from my decades of research is that incivility usually arises from ignorance — not malice. People lack self-awareness. According to research by Tasha Eurich, an organizational psychologist and a collaborator of mine, a whopping 95% of people think they’re self-aware but only 10%–15% actually are. That means 80%–85% of people misunderstand how they’re perceived and how they affect others. We may have good intentions and work hard to be patient and tolerant, but our tones, nonverbal signals, or actions may come across differently to the people we interact with and those who witness the interactions.
不文明行为的代价
The Costs of Incivility
研究表明，不文明就像一般感冒：会传染，传播速度快，工作、家庭和社群中的任何人都可能是携带者，而且很容易就会被感染。不文明行为扩散，会在以下几个方面影响人与组织。
Research shows that rudeness is like the common cold: It’s contagious, it spreads quickly, anyone can be a carrier — at work, at home, online, or in our communities — and getting infected doesn’t take much. When incivility does spread, it affects people and organizations in several ways.
不文明行为对身心的损害。仅仅是接触到粗鲁的词语，都会降低我们处理和回忆信息的能力，机能失调和攻击性的想法（有时是行为）会急速增加。看到粗鲁的表现和不文明行为的诱因，比如在社交媒体上看到一条讨厌的评论，或者听到一场有争议的采访，会对认知造成损害，干扰我们的工作记忆，影响表现。这类干扰可能极其严重。例如，已有研究证明，接触粗鲁行为会对医疗团队的诊断和流程表现产生负面影响。
Incivility’s mental and physical toll. Merely being exposed to rude words reduces our ability to process and recall information. Dysfunctional and aggressive thoughts (and sometimes actions) can skyrocket. Witnessing rudeness and triggers of incivility — such as reading a nasty comment on social media or listening to an argumentative interview — takes a cognitive toll, interfering with our working memory and decreasing our performance. And these disruptions can be catastrophic. For example, exposure to rudeness has been shown to negatively impact medical teams’ diagnoses and procedural performance.
不文明行为在商业上的影响。我最近的研究发现，人们看到员工或一线工人被粗鲁对待，85%的人感到烦恼，80%感到不安，75%感到愤怒，此外还有61%的人表示自己感到痛苦，43%感觉受到威胁。
Incivility’s toll on business. In my recent research, I found that when people witness rude treatment of employees or frontline workers, 85% report being annoyed, 80% are upset, and 75% are angry. Additionally, 61% report being distressed and 43% feel threatened.
顾客看到其他顾客对员工无礼，会有几种不同的反应。他们对员工的态度会有所改善，但对员工所在组织的感受会发生转变，而这种转变对公司而言代价高昂：42%的人表示粗鲁行为改变了自己对公司的看法，40%的人质疑公司是否还想再做生意，65%的人认为组织应当更好地保护员工，45%的人质疑组织价值观——总体而言，人们使用该公司产品及服务的意愿下降了35%。麦金尼斯、福克斯和我发现，这些感受与对人类尊严和他人是否得到尊重的关注紧密相连。
When customers witness other customers being uncivil to employees, they have a few responses. Their attitudes toward the employees improve, but their feelings toward the workers’ organization shift in costly ways: 42% report that the rude behavior changes their perception of the company, 40% question whether they want to do business there again, 65% think the organization should better protect its employees, 45% question its values — and, overall, people’s willingness to use the company’s products and services drops 35%. MacInnis, Folkes, and I found that these feelings are tied to concerns for human dignity and whether others are being treated respectfully.
所幸，文明的感染力也一样大。我们无法控制顾客的行为，但可以制定和执行尊重人的行为规范，指导员工处理困难对话，并展示休息和恢复的价值，协助员工应对不良行为。我的研究证实，善意、体贴和尊重可以发挥强大的效果，创造一种积极的文明动力，让他人甚至是那些粗鲁的顾客做出跟进或改进等的回应，并以此为基础继续发展。
Fortunately, civility’s power to spread is just as great. We can’t control what customers do, but we can equip our employees to handle bad behavior by establishing and enforcing norms of respect, coaching them to have difficult conversations, and showing them the value of rest and recovery. My research confirms that kindness, consideration, and respect can have a potent effect, creating a positive dynamic of civility that others — maybe even those rude customers — will respond to and build on.
关键词：职场
克里斯汀·波拉斯（Christine Porath) | 文
克里斯汀·波拉斯是乔治敦大学管理学教授，也是一名协助领先企业创造繁荣工作场所的咨询顾问。她的著作有《把握社群：团结起来让我们从生存走向繁荣》（Mastering Community: The Surprising Ways Coming Together Moves Us from Surviving to Thriving）、《职场礼仪2.0：提升人际交往能力的技巧》（Mastering Civility: A Manifesto for the Workplace）以及与人合著的《不良行为的代价》（The Cost of Bad Behavior）。
蒋荟蓉 | 译 时青靖 | 校 廖琦菁 | 编辑
本文有删节，原文见《哈佛商业评论》中文版2023年2月刊。
