2023年高考英语新课标卷读后续写深度解读与示范（山西用）
2023年高考英语新课标1/2卷（读后续写）
第二节(满分25分)
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
（人与自我——校园话题“师生关系：体现良师益友”——B1U1校园第一天）
When I was in middle school, my social studies teacher asked me to enter a writing contest. I said no without thinking. I did not love writing. My family came from Brazil, so English was only my second language. Writing was so difficult and painful for me that my teacher had allowed me to present my paper on the sinking of the Titanic by acting out a play, where I played all the parts. No one laughed harder than he did.
So, why did he suddenly force me to do something at which I was sure to fail? His reply: “Because I love your stories. If you're willing to apply yourself, I think you have a good shot at this." Encouraged by his words, I agreed to give it a try.
I chose Paul Revere's horse as my subject. Paul Revere was a silversmith(银匠) in Boston who rode a horse at night on April 18, 1775 to Lexington to warn people that British soldiers were coming. My story would come straight from the horse's mouth. Not a brilliant idea, but funny; and unlikely to be anyone else's choice.
What did the horse think, as he sped through the night? Did he get tired? Have doubts? Did he want to quit? I sympathized immediately. I got tired. I had doubts. I wanted to quit. But, like Revere's horse, I kept going. I worked hard. I checked my spelling. I asked my older sister to correct my grammar. I checked out a half-dozen books on Paul Revere from the library. I even read a few of them.
When I handed in the essay to my teacher, he read it, laughed out loud, and said, "Great. Now, write it again." I wrote it again, and again and again. When I finally finished it, the thought of winning had given way to the enjoyment of writing. If I didn't win, I wouldn't care.
注意：
1.续写词数应为150个左右；
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1
A few weeks later, when I almost forgot the contest, there came the news.——“数周之后，在我几乎忘记比赛之时，消息确传来了”可以得知：本段续写的核心在于通过利用“突如其来的消息”引发一系列的惊喜，但是反转的设计确是本段最为出彩的环节。考虑到第二段续写的提示为“我在颁奖之后来到老师的办公室”，我们可以顺其自然地联想到“我在享受荣光之时，老师确没有出现”，这样处理1.可以很自然的设计出高潮与反转的强烈对比；2.同时为二段续写的连贯性做好了铺垫，“我必然为了一探究竟要去找老师的”。——参考词汇涉及：writing contest；social studies teacher；award presentation
Paragraph 1
A few weeks later, when I almost forgot the contest, there came the news. After being told that I won the first prize in the writing contest and later I would attend the award ceremony with all the teachers and students, I felt at that moment a sense of happiness mixed with surprise flooded into my mind. Soon after/before long/After a short while/Shortly afterwards, in the company of my classmates, at the award presentation appeared I, who immediately became the only focus in the big hall. Thunderous applause echoed in my ears when our principal presented me with the certificate. Excited to look around, I didn’t spot my social studies teacher in the crowd so I decided to meet him afterwards and knew why.（4句）
Paragraph 2
I went to the teacher’s office after the award presentation.——“我在颁奖之后来到老师的办公室”，本段的续写是本次高考最值得“玩味的部分”，是考察考生真正硬核实力和语言能力的关键。郭老师本段是这样创设的：通过老师所谓的“玩世不恭”的一贯表现，给“我”带来了困惑，但是话锋一转，真正的老师往往对于学生的影响都是“润物细无声”，这样即避免了使用“意义不大的直接引语”来充斥字数，同时通过“无声胜有声的写作手法”还提升了自己的写作境界，可谓“一箭双雕”。在即将收笔之处又出现了我们经典的写作思维：1.过去对过去的逻辑；2.今昔对比的逻辑。毕竟作为高考写作中“四大关系”命题之一，我们哪里能错过此等“天载难逢之机”。因此，当我解读到此处相比老生已经“心领神会”了。最后我设计了两种结尾。
Paragraph 2
I went to the teacher’s office after the award presentation. When I pushed the door open, I was astonished to find he was reading my essay but as usual still laughed out loud. At the sight of my coming, he didn’t stop laughing which made me feel confused, but soon after, with our eyes contacting together, I figured out the reason why he didn’t appear at the scene is because he wanted me to enjoy success and glory alone while he chose to support me in silence. I couldn’t hide my gratitude, dashing/rushing at him to hug him tightly. （结尾1）Without his help, writing were still difficult and painful for me. Fortunately, it was him who taught me how to open the door to writing and taste the enjoyment of writing.（5句：采用过去对过去的思路）
或者
（结尾2）Nowadays, I have become a professional writer, but each time I recall the scene, always comes up my social studies teacher who used to help change a Brazilian child into a real writer enjoying the joy brought by writing.（4句：采用今昔对比的思路）
2023年高考英语新课标1/2卷的读后续写点评：
本次读后续写延续了2022年的“人与自我”主题，依旧把场景安排在了校园，关系依旧是“师生关系”，所以这两年的作文从句命题的思路上可谓“一脉相承”，从具体行文的角度来看，从2022年学生扮演老师转变为了2023年学生本色出演的方向。从句行文的思路而言，考生更有“代入感”。
但是，今年命题的亮点确是“精彩”，我在进行本文创设的过程中，思绪喷涌，亮点不断。但是考虑到考生的具体能力与思维力，我这里进行了高考最常见的处理“师生关系”的立意——即“良师益友”，如何把立意对接到我的social studies teacher虽然在一幅“玩世不恭”的教学态度上，确帮助我由一个“英语不好的移民”变为一个“英语作家”的励志故事上。
而我们外研社的同步课本B1U1和B1U3给了我们很好的示范，教学生如何处理“人际关系”，真可谓“要不不出手，一出手都透露着‘教考一体化’的教学与命题思路”，总之我对于命题人一个“大大的服气”（ps：不学好同步课本真不行啊）。
本文的两段的创设中，首段创设具体要体现在“我在享受荣耀时，我的恩人确不在身边”这种遗憾与对其中原因的寻找；二段创设的关键在于如何实现“良师益友”的立意，真正的高人都是“做了好事不轻易留名——即学生在独享荣耀时，老师确能泰然自若，如同没有发生任何事情一般的波澜不惊”，通过这一番行文操作，我受到影响难道不会“受用一生”么？明白这些之后，就把所有的表达交给“英语”来解决吧。（反思：考生的语言能力能够驾驭以上的中文思维与逻辑）
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